Oh Howard...

• Grandpa:Is this Alex?
• Me:Yes, Grandpa. How are you?
• Grandpa:Happy birthday!
• Me:Today's not my birthday, grandpa.
• Grandpa:I have it here on my calender: Alex Birthday...for today.
• Me:My birthday's in October, grandpa.
• Grandpa:October? Why does my calender say today?
• Me:I don't know...you tell me.
• Grandpa:Well, happy birthday anyhow.