Oh Howard... Grandpa: Is this Alex?
Me: Yes, Grandpa. How are you?
Grandpa: Happy birthday!
Me: Today's not my birthday, grandpa.
Grandpa: I have it here on my calender: Alex Birthday...for today.
Me: My birthday's in October, grandpa.
Grandpa: October? Why does my calender say today?
Me: I don't know...you tell me.
Grandpa: Well, happy birthday anyhow.